Baltimore, Eh?

I am in Baltimore for a few days and what is there really to do in Baltimore?
Well, I could go to an Orioles game. They're not in town.
I could go to a fancy restaurant and each crab like a cave man. I did that this evening with the Farmers guys and gals and I'm here to tell you - the smell does not go lightly into that still night. I have washed my hands numerous times and even rinsed them in lemon juice. It is the curse the crab leaves since I decided to eat him. Yes, I was told all of the crabs were men/males. I'm not sure if this is important to the crabs but I was told they were all male. I apologized to each of them as I cracked them with my crab hammer. My boss kept telling me it was a mallet but crab hammer sounded funnier. Also a good name for the band. Their first hit - I like my hot dogs hot.
The restaurant was in the worst neighborhood I have been in in a long time. It reminds me of Rochester but with more crack and whores. If Florida is America's dong, the Baltimore is the hemmorhoid on America's ass. It has a few blocks downtown that seem pretty cool but then you drive just a few blocks and you see the real Baltimore, hemmerhoidal warts and all. I would not like to live here.

I am excited to watch Harry Potter and the huge mega hit this Friday. I saw in USA Today that Harry is set to make $43 million for the last two movies. I wouldn't mind making $43 million. I would even loive in Baltimore for $43 million. Not for ever but for a little while. Everything has its price.

I applied for another job at Farmers. The guy who h ad m ore experience than me got it. I figured as much. I am now in line to get his old job which would be OK by me. I'll keep you informed. I figured it was time to stop working in my jammies. I need to remember what it is like to have a real job. Go to work and wear clothes and all. Otherwise I might find myself jammied and having a hard time going back to work.

Baltimore is hoit and humid as well. It also has mosquitos. And did I mention how ugly it is? Well let me mention it herre - Baltimore is ugly. It is old city grimy ugly at its core. I guess there might be nice suburbs but I haven't seen them.

And another thing - why do computers screw up for no reason. I returned from the cabin and my air card willnot function. I didn't use it in Idaho. It just decided to not work. Now I have to be on the phone with the help desk for the next thirteen days nonstop until someone can tell me that I need a new computer. That is my nickel bet. After they try to do a quintillion things to fix it they will say it is dead and I need a new one. Computers are great and all. They make my life easier when they work. When they hate me, as this one obviously does, they are a source of misery and woe. And woe is me. I will keep you informed on how the computer turns out. It might be four months but I will be back on line and let you all know.

Enough for now. I am in the hotel room and they are showing Batman for the 9th time on HBO and I feel I should watch it again and again and again.

The pup is out.