Thursday, August 13, 2009

Son of Baltimore

I am, once again, on a plane back from Baltimore. My opinion of this lovely city has not changed. In fact it has deteriorated just a smidgen if that is possible.

It started like this. We, as the QA department, went to an Orioles game on Monday evening. I went because I wanted to see Camden Yard and it was lovely. I thik we were there with a few dozen other fans since the A’s and the Orioles are two of the worst teams in baseball. It was hot and muggy and the Orioles really suck large oysters. We arrived late because there was “weather” in the Midwest. I don’t really know what that means or why we were unable to fly around it but we were late because of this weather somewhere in the Midwest. So we get there in the third inning. By the sixth inning the wind starts to pick up and then there is garbage and papers flying all over the field. A thunderstorm of biblical proportions whips up and we can see that this game is not going to be completed. We all decide we should make a dash to the car (500 yards away) and we start a brisk walk towards the parking lots. Not 50 feet into our walk the heavens open and we are completely and utterly drenched. I had just rented a very nice Infiniti sports car and was thinking how lucky I was to have such a nice autocoach. When we all got to the car and jumped in, it was like jumping onto leather upholstery from a swimming pool. There was no where to dry off since outside the car was solid rain/water/moisture/Baltimore-ness. So we made out way to the hotel as three drowned rats and retired for the evening.

The next day is when the fun s tarts. Baltimore, being in the tropical part of North America, had a relative humidity of 1500% these last few days. In fact, it was 92%. So, as you might imaging, the seats never really dried out the three days Ii was in Baltimore-is-so-lame. So every day when we got to the conference and every night coming home, it looked like I had recently wet myself and not just slightly. Good times. Eh?

This is the last few weeks of my dual job situation. I am doing my QA job and getting an additional 30 emails a day from my new boss to keep me in the loop. Right now I would enjoy being outside the loop for these last two weeks but I doubt I will get that chance.

Kevin returns home tomorrow, or today depending on when you read this. I am typing as if he returns tomorrow so deal with it. We are excited for his return. It will be a different house with him here. I’m sure Sacrament meeting will be a different place when he is there as well. Many people in the ward comment on how they miss the randomness and excitement of a Kevin testimony. We, as his parents, are filled with emotions as well. Since he is now all grown up and an adult (at least legally) he can testify of whatever he wants or however he wants. Being in the singles ward we have heard the term “butt” from the pulpit so he is no longer the only person to have done it. I still think he is the only one who uttered the term “buttload.” So he still has that going for him. It will be an exciting few weeks until he goes back to school.

As I sit on the plane I am still amused at the number of people who can not seem to grasp the concept of not forming a line near the cockpit. The expression of unbelief on their face when the flight crew tells them to sit down is amazing. ‘What do you mean I can’t just stand here and wait?” It is only reinforced about 30 times during the flight. Oh well.

There you go. Puppy on the blog.
Good day to you all.

2 comments:

DiaNe said...

You can take the Kevin out of Stupid, but you can't take the stupid out of Kevin.

Glad you survived the humidity.

Lisa B. said...

Sirrah, Baltimore sounds like fresh hell. I am so grateful to you for your investigative reporting, which has ensured that I will never go there, except fictively when I watch seasons 2-5 of The Wire. Thank you very much.